Stop being nice, be genuine

I’m so excited to share with you the latest books that I got. Last week I was with a client, who absolutely insisted that I read a book by this certain author. He had just come back from a conference and must I just add, his energy, enthusiasm and a new perspectives to life were too grand to miss. So the author is none other than Thomas d’ Ansembourg, renowned for his non – violent communications work. Have you read any books by him? If not, I’m sure Google is working out the search for you now. But in a nutshell, he is a Belgian best seller author, who after practicing law for over ten years, decided to change his career to become a  psychotherapist and trainer in human relations.

The books that I got are called:

1.  “Être heureux, ce n’est pas nécessairement confortable” // Being happy is not necessarily comfortable.

Where he talks about the illusions of happiness, how to recognise the traps and how to get out of them despite the difficulties. In his book he uses a bit of humour to convey his message, even cartoon illustrations, which makes it easier to digest a heavy blow. There are so many ‘yes, yes, yes, moments’ when reading this book. For example, when he says we are told in life, you’ll be happy if you follow these steps: go to school get a diploma, get a job, get married, have children etc, you get the picture. So if not then, are we not happy? It’s a journey of self recognition, acceptance and letting go. I’ve just read snippets of it as I want to start with the second book below.

2. “Cessez d’être gentil, soyez vrai” // Stop being ice, be genuine.

I’m sure this book is talking to me and that’s why I did not hesitate for a second to click the buy now button on my Amazon. I am that person who wears a mask and tries to please others while deep down inside, I’m burning to express my wishes and desires. This feeling is killing, to say the least. I can’t count the number of times where I have acted this way. On the other side, there are those who react violently in order to be heard.  So the book talks about how we can survive together whilst being true to oneself, all the way avoiding violence.

My favourite quote from Thomas d’assenbourg is, “Violence is not our nature, but the expression of the violation of our nature”

I personally love self reflection journey. Once I truly understand myself, I believe I could then apply myself to being with others and build relationships. What do you think about the books? Have you read them or care to share some views? Interested to know your comments.

Marie x

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